The sacred hand grenade is a weapon / easter egg in fiction by GMRE.

Description and development historyEdit

This is something I actually thought of about 10 years ago at a gaming forum for a GTA San Andreas, long before we knew where GTA IV would be set.

It's an obvious easter egg to "the holy hand grenade".

The weapon is a golden ball bout 15 cm across, covered with jewels and with a small gold cross on top. The cross is the handle that must be removed to activate it.


I don't know, try to imagine a really powerful grenade... Oh wait! I've got it! It can still be the most powerful weapon in the game, thanks to the grappler and the bavarium wingsuit.

According to "the book of armaments", chapter 2, verses 9 to 21: "And st. Antioch raised the hand grenade upon high, saying "Oh Lord, bless this, thine grenade, that with it thou may'st blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy." And the Lord did grin. And the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths and crap and anchovies and orangutans and breakfast cereals and fruit bats and large..." Skipping ahead a little. "And the Lord spake, saying: "First shall thou take out the holy pin. Then shalt thou count to three. No more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shall thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thine holy hand grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who being not in my sight, shall snuff it." "

So basically once activated, there shall be 3 seconds to throw it and blast off, using the bavarium wingsuit. The wingsuit is only barely fast enough to out-fly the explosion fireball. Being the most powerful weapon in the game, it would be more powerful than the M488.

It would be powerful enough to complete an off-shore rig in a single detonation.


This would be a bit easier for Rico than a GTA protagonist, but I'll keep the original idea.

Imagine a high cliff at a remote edge of the map (like the volcano island of Medici). On the steep cliff, half way down, would be a cave. How you get there is up to you. Once you enter, there would be a corridor that has a few turns, so you'd be navigating in complete darkness. And there would be a few sentry guns behind a few of these corners. At the end would be a room lit by wall-mounted torches. There would be three doors. Two of them would teleport you to the far corners of the map and the third would lead to the next room. Which door does what would be set at random. The last room would have a pedestal with a jewel-covered gold box. Once approached, the player would take the grenade out of the box. This would automatically lock the door and the player would have to jump into the waterfall that is exposed at the back of the room. The room would have only 3 walls and the back wall would just be a hole that leads to a cave that has an underground waterfall. After jumping into that, you'd wake up on the beach next to a cave where the underground river exits the mountain. It's not possible to enter though there.

So yeah. It would not be easy to obtain it.


  • This is the first possibly magical weapon on this wiki.
  • At the time of adding, this is the oldest explosive weapon on this wiki.


Monty Python Holy Hand Grenade05:07

Monty Python Holy Hand Grenade

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